This article is being written by someone who doesn’t even like beer, whose beer drinking basically began and ended during my freshman year of college.
“You should keep drinking beer until you like it,” I was basically told by several people. “It’s important.”
The “logic” of these advisers was that you couldn’t succeed in the business world unless you learned to drink beer. Apparently, successful business executives are all weak-minded followers rather than strong-willed people with the knowledge and judgment to make smart and important decisions.
Back then, beer was such a good excuse for bad behavior that virtually everyone I talked to was outraged that the state of New Jersey decided to prosecute the student who lived diagonally across the hall from me for involuntary manslaughter after his drunk driving caused the death of his friend, who lived in the room next to mine.
Thankfully, times have changed. Society now has a much lower tolerance for drunk driving thanks to groups like Mothers Against Drunk Driving.
But I haven’t changed. I still do not like beer. I like orange juice, tomato juice, vegetable juice, pineapple juice, apple juice, and many other juices. Since I love juice, why do I even need to try a beer?
I know so little about beer that I didn’t even know there was such a thing as a winter beer or a summer beer until a client asked me to write an article about the best beers to drink at a concert. I decided to convert the story assignment into a winter beer/indoor concert vs. summer beer/outdoor concert article. In the article, I pretended to be a regular beer drinker and a connoisseur of good beer.
This article is based on that research. It shows that I am so dedicated to the readers of Storeboard.com that I will post articles on subjects that I know nothing about because I know that many of Storeboard.com’s readers are interested in beer. And I wanted to post that article today, which is supposedly going to be the last really cold day of what has been a miserably cold winter.
I now know that the best winter beers have a higher percentage of alcohol than the best summer beers and are also warmer, heavier and thicker. Many great winter beers are also generally shot through with toasty malt and spice. I know all of these things because Men’s Health magazine told me so.
Below are the magazine’s choices for the top eight winter beers. The quotes are theirs.
Boulevard Harvest Dance Wheat Wine Style Ale: Alcohol by volume (ABV): 9.5 percent “It merges wheat beer with barley wine to create a dry-finishing brew replete with tropical fruit and entirely worthy of your holiday dinner table.”
Founders Backwoods Bastard: ABV: 10.2 percent “This brew tastes like the result of root beer and moonshine dusted with spice and aged in a charred oak bourbon barrel.”
Deschutes Jubelale: ABV: 6.7 percent “Our tasters enjoyed the robust blend of spice, coffee, and fruit.”
Magic Hat Heart of Darkness: ABV: 5.7 percent “It pours dark with a chocolate milk head and drinks like sweet cocoa spiked with bitter espresso.”
Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale: ABV: 6.8 percent “The pine and citrus notes come not from pine needles and orange peels, but from the brewery’s skilled arrangement of Cascade, Centennial, and Chinook hops.”
Bell's Winter White Ale: ABV: 5 percent “This is the winter beer for guys who miss summer—it’s the lightest, most refreshing beer we tasted.”
Sam Adams Old Fezziwig: ABV: 5.8 percent “It’s sweet, toasty, and loaded with more holiday spice than a punchbowl of eggnog.”
Great Divide Hibernation Ale: ABV: 12.4 percent “After spending 9 months in a whiskey barrel, this brew emerges with a roar of chocolate, caramel, and brown sugar.”
I have to admit that I sort of have a desire to drink these beers after reading these mouth-watering descriptions by someone who is a much better beer writer than I am. Bon appetit (with beer).
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